What I hope for for my son

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My dad has today told me that the main thing he wanted for me in life was that I’d “not be a wimp”. I don’t really know what that means, but since I was bullied through school and am still occasionally paralysed by shyness, I’m not sure it worked out. Either way, it’s not something that had ever occurred to me as a priority for bringing up a child.

So I’ve been thinking about characteristics and behaviours that I’d like to support in my boy. (These may or may not be influenced by my own experiences).

I want him to be emotionally secure enough to recognise happiness in the everyday things.

I want to help him to be naturally kind, with no emotional obligations attached.

I want to encourage him to look for the best in people, not be instantly critical, snobbish or suspicious. To have empathy.

I want for him to not consider it normal to drive for short distances, so that fitness comes naturally to him and is not an effort.

I want to help him have the confidence to try things and not worry about failing. Not feel he has to be a perfectionist.

I don’t want him to be paralysed in social situations by feeling he has to have a “best behaviour”.

I want to show him that it isn’t lazy or irresponsible to think that work isn’t the most important thing in life.

I want to help him to be curious and interested and love life. Most of all, want him to be happy and bring happiness to others. Of course, I hope he is secure and confident in himself, but not being a wimp doesn’t come into it.

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