Aprons that make you smile.

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I’ve never owned an apron before, I don’t *read can’t* cook! I don’t *again,read cant* bake so have never felt the need for a pinny.

 

I received a package one day, opened, frantically clawing at the paper, like an excited child on Christmas morning. My prize, an apron!

It was perfectly folded, I unraveled and immediately felt a pang in my heart, flutters in my tummy, then came a tear. I felt such a mix of happy emotions, how could an apron make me feel this way?

Well I shall tell you why, because this apron came from a wonderful lady, this wonderful lady is a part of a group of wonderful ladies (and man). These wonderful ladies live everyday with me, these ladies have been with me through pain, upset, depression, carried me when I could no longer cope, made me laugh and cry in equal measures.

This group of people mean more to me than they could ever realise.

I still don’t cook or bake but I do wear me apron everyday and everytime I wear it I think of these wonderful people, the apron has powers, it makes me feel special, because this apron reminds me of those wonderful people.

So to the person who bought me that special gift (you know who you are) it is much more than just an apron to me. You wonderful person!

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“Do you know what he’s just told you”

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Another day began with numbness, pain and fatigue. I was used to by now. But something new had appeared, I found myself stumbling around, falling, forgetting. I was about to put some laundry on the radiator and once again found myself somewhere that had become all too familiar – the floor.

“Will you get to the bloody doctors” he exclaimed.

‘He’ is my wonderful husband, the most amazing person in my life, devoted dad, and now my carer.

 

After several more days I relented and made an appointment, I was ready to be told I had sciatica and sent home with pain killers that would sort the pain but wipe me out in the process. But it would mean I didn’t have to hear “will you get to the bloody doctors” anymore.

That doctors appointment changed my life, it changed it in a way you would never imagine. That day I said good bye to who I was and became a different person, a person who to this day I don’t know. And quite honestly I don’t want to know her, I want to be the person I used to be before that day, infact I want that day to never have happened.

I went into that appointment a seemingly heathy normal 29 year old with hardly any cares in the world. 2 days later I became a 29 year old with a disease, an incurable disease that has 8 months on, got such a strong grip on me I’m a shadow of the person I used to be.

That day that changed my life was October 2nd 2013, that was the day I was told I had MS.

I sat there on the hospital bed, I had just been told, I had no clue what MS was. A nurse came in to ask if I was ok, “I’m great thanks” I replied, because I was great, she looked at me, she had sorry eyes, such a caring face “do you know what he has just told you” of course I knew, I have MS apparently the MRI’s say so. She hugged me, I hugged her back.

But what was MS? I had no clue, clearly it was an explanation for my numb leg and frequent falls. Wonderful, I thought, a name for why I feel like I do.

I was oblivious, I was to find out shortly after what exactly MS was and how my life was going to change forever. I wanted to go back to being oblivious because oblivious meant I didn’t know the true extent of what MS was.